Are you starving?

What should worry all of us more than the issue of whether so-called climate change is anthropogenic is the unintended consequences of this proposition on world food production.


Thanks partly to the Gore-induced panic, cereal production for human consumption (via animal feeds as well) is being switched to biofuel production. This is at a time when China and other rapidly developing countries are soaking up more and more of the world's wheat, meat and dairy products - and paying top dollar too - while we too are reducing our staple food output.


Time for Great Britain to stop thinking we can affect global changes in weather conditions by any kind of unilateral action and just concentrate on protecting our population's needs for the future.


We are used to relatively cheap food. The shock of 50% or 70% increases in our household food bills in the next few years will be worse than the rises in all the other taxes that Brown has imposed on us for the last 10 years.


Or is he going to nationalise Tesco as well as Northern Rock?

A Big Pot of Piss?

I thought I had given up this blogging stuff but I had this wonderful image come to mind when I was watching BBC News 24's newspaper review a few minutes ago. Admittedly, it was under the influence of two thirds of a very pleasant and cheap bottle of Californian red wine - cheers Gollum! (£3.99 from Tesco.)

One of the reviewers commented on Brown's attempt to create a government of all the talons (sic) and made the predictable joke about Mrs T going to tea at No. 10. He then suggested that the arch-manipulator, rather than trying to create a big tent was putting up a very large marquee following the report that Lord Owen (of Gang of Four fame back in the '80s) was considering throwing in his lot with the esteemed Scot.

On the well-established basis that it is better to have people pissing into the tent rather than pissing out, my mind turned to the practicalities of dealing with the much larger amounts of urine now pouring into Gordon's marquee. After all, it's bound to spray all over the place - ask my wife - and also gets into places you wouldn't expect! How would you mop it up? How could you make sure your marquee was clean and hygienic?

Gordon has the solution: forget the "Nanny State" - we are now in the "Super Nappy State" that can absorb all those little spillages. Just piss in towards Gordon and he will soak it up.

What? No Policies?

Christ almighty! If I hear anyone else say that the Conservatives have no policies I will poke Iain Dale in his eyes with a compass.
Just give me a hint what Labour's policies are, lads? Sure - they are doing things, reacting to things, ignoring things, back tracking on things and avoiding doing things (eg a referendum on the EU treaty) but what is their message, their vision? Everything is OK, don't worry we've got it all under control?
As far as I can see they have done most of the things they set out to do in 1997 and most of it is all buggered up now and they have no new ideas. They're tired and the only "good" thing Brown can do is get us out of Iraq PDQ and scale down our involvement in Afghanistan. Pouring aid (ie our taxes) into Africa might make him look like Mother Theresa - come to think of it he is getting a bit wrinkled - but unless this is linked to expansion of free trade it's money down the tubes (SNAFU).
Brown's foreign "policies" will disguise Labour's complete failure on the domestic front.
I heard David Blunkett on Radio 4 this morning saying the original plan was always to increase the prison population to 80,000 and then introduce programmes to educate and rehabilitate prisoners so they did not re-offend and, thus, be "tough on the causes of crime". He admitted they had failed to deliver on the last bit!
Brown, as the "most successful Chancellor for 250 years" was, at the very least, party to all these failures to deliver not least because of the draconian way he controlled all expenditure and tax-raising decisions.
I won't start on tax credits because you've probably already stopped reading. But please, if anyone knows, let me know what Labour's policies are.

Wow! That's an another surprise for Gordon Brown

The head of the Army has issued a dire warning that Britain has almost run out of troops to defend the country or fight abroad, according to a secret document obtained by the Daily Telegraph.

No doubt we'll be hearing a lot about the analysis of the by-election results in Sedgefield and Ealing & Southall over the weekend but these events are largely irrelevant when our service men and women's lives are being threatened by the incompetence of Gordon Brown.

Gen Sir Richard Dannatt has told senior commanders that reinforcements for emergencies or for operations in Iraq or Afghanistan are "now almost non-existent". In a memorandum to fellow defence leaders, the Chief of the General Staff confessed that "we now have almost no capability to react to the unexpected". The "undermanned" Army now has all its units committed to either training for war in Iraq and Afghanistan, on leave or on operations.

It is not the first time Gen Dannatt has raised concerns on Britain's fighting ability. A few weeks into his job last year, Sir Richard said the military was "running hot" and urged for a national debate on defence.

I seem to remember that Gordon Brown said recently in Parliament that a key objective of any government is to ensure the security of its people. How well has he provided for these events? I suspect he has not even given it a thought. After all he leaves all that sort of detail to his kinsman Des Browne!

How to make a small fortune

In a previous life I was (for a very short time) a financial adviser associated with a very prestigious merchant bank which was long ago absorbed into the globalised banking industry. (I hasten to add that I never mis-sold a pension and actually helped a lot of people improve their long term financial position.)

But the standing joke with my colleagues at the time was "How do you make a small fortune? Invest a large one with our bank!"

Ring any bells? Gordon Brown has been "investing" your money for the last ten years and what have we got to show for it? Answers on a postage stamp please!

The United Kingdom used to be recognised as one of the richest nations in the world. Under this New (Brown) Labour government this country has dropped down this list and we should remember:

• There are five million people of working age not in work
• The poorest people in Britain have got poorer under Labour
• There are more young people not in work or full-time education than ten years ago
• We have one of the highest rates of family breakdown in Europe
• Most European countries recognise marriage in their tax system; Britain doesn’t.

The list could go on but it would only reinforce the abject failure of Gordon Brown and the erstwhile Blair to use your money to improve the fortunes of this once great country.

Winston Churchill is history?

The educational establishment in this country have really got their heads up their arses. Now they are saying that we should not teach children about Winston Churchill's role in our history.

This would normally be the occasion when I'd say "will the last one to leave the country please turn out the lights?" But there will be plenty of sad people left here still plugging away with their so-called "modernising" tendencies. We've had 30 years of this destruction of British values and perspectives of our history and look where we are now.

Maybe now is the time to stay and fight this nonsense?

Do you feel lucky, Hunk?

I was amused by Iain Dale's blog today One for the Ladies... (I Think) where he published a photo of himself aged 22.

It was very similar to the one of me aged 20 in the photo shown on the left. It was taken on a holiday in Split which is a wonderful walled city in Croatia but in those days was in Yugoslavia. (I'm talking about 1969 which is probably beyond living memory for you dear reader.)

But having indulged in this little bit of nostalgia (and, I have to admit some sadness at the loss of my youthful vigour) I suddenly realised there were some other parallels with Iain Dale which made me uncomfortable. My birthday is in July (as is Iain's); I too tried to grow a beard at one point and found it a little bit gingery; and I have to admit that I could also lose a few pounds! You could also point out that we both support the Conservative Party although he is more passionate than I am perhaps.

Then it dawned on me that all these coincidences could only mean one thing. I must be gay!

When I confided this to my wife she pointed out in her usual sensible way that, in addition to the three children I have fathered (that we know of), I don't wear brightly coloured ties, I prefer Rugby to soccer, would never have a dog in the house, smoke too much and don't like the Germans I realised that she still had her "hunk" despite all the time I spend watching 18 Doughty Street. Oh, lucky man!

I'm 'avin a fag!

Good old Charlie! Caught having a crafty drag out of the train window he apparently thought he wasn't breaking the law which he voted for.

Now, I know he is a Liberal Democrat but that doesn't mean there is one law for him and one for the rest of us plebs. I'm a smoker too and have to put up with the democratic decision that was made in Parliament.

All those people who are members of working men's clubs or social institutes where they have gone for years to have a drink and a smoke with their neighbours all have to abide by this law too. Don't forget these are private clubs where you have to pay to be a member. So you make a choice to join and are fully aware of the rules and regulations. There were no rules to say you couldn't smoke in the bar unless the members themselves had voted for them. Democracy in action, you might say but after 1st July 2007 our supposed democratic Parliament decided to take away this right.

So, in my view Goodtime Charlie should, as a so-called democrat, be subjected to the full rigours of the law he voted for and be prosecuted like any other common "criminal" that we smokers have become!

Ming the Winnner!

An extremely elderly man in a Savile Row suit, looking like Bill Deedes's older brother, apparently leads the Liberal Democratic Party. Well, for the time being anyway if the rumours are to be believed.

The latest betting for the LibDems to win the next General Election is 150/1 - not much surprise there. But for some reason there are members of his party who think they should change their current leader as this would improve their electoral chances.

I don't know about you but if someone takes this job on they will have to be a bloody superman (sorry, superperson). My advice is stick with Ming - it's steady as you go, LibDems.

Gosh, that must hurt!

Why would anyone want to do this to themselves? I can only assume at this stage that it's got something to do with wanting to go to paradise with 72 virgins awaiting their arrival with great anticipation.

But for a man who has trained as a doctor and spent years of his life learning how to diagnose and treat disease and injury in fellow humans it is incredible that he should contemplate causing such potential death and destruction. What sort of belief system would engender such a course of action? He's not a disadvantaged youth in a high unemployment area that has been "turned" by some evil imam at the local mosque into a homicidal maniac. So what has made him what he is?

I think he, and his friends, are simply evil and will only be stopped if we confront them wherever they are or whatever they do. They cannot be allowed to intimidate the rest of us - ever! This might mean we have to accept some (temporary and intermittent) erosion of our hard fought liberties but this does not mean we have to have ID cards! Ever!